Testimony, by Ambie Snell

Testimony

May 8^th, 2013

            As I have reflected on my life experiences that have anchored my testimony of Jesus Christ, the Hymn I Need Thee Every Hour plays through my mind and reaches my soul and I can feel humility in my heart because of the despair I’ve felt and the healing that has taken place there.

            At the tender ages of 3-6 I went through some major health problems that should have taken my life. I frequently look back at that time and thank my Heavenly Father for sparing my life. Because of the words of a faithful mother growing up, I knew my survival meant I have a purpose to accomplish.

            There are other times when I’ve asked “Why was my life spared”- mostly when I see others suffering to death, I have remorse for surviving. Today, I think of my young naive self and remember that not once did I feel helpless like I was going to die- but I know through many prayers and especially the ones offered by my faithful mother as she was in His need my mortal body was able to over come what held it in bondage for so long.  This was life altering experience number one.

            My second life experience came about 13 years later. I grew up in the church and taught by my dad for many years in Sunday School about the basic principles of the Gospel and about the Restoration. He eventually left the church.

            My father and I have a strange relationship in that we have a bond that is unexplainable but not close at the same time. I’ve felt a strong inclination ever since he left the church that I needed to bring him back. At the age of 19 I was reading, desperately searching the scriptures for the first time in my life. I was on a hunt to find the answer to some questions that my father had about the church. Day after day I pleaded in such a high need of my Heavenly Father’s help. It was through this plea that I gained my first witness of the Restoration of the Gospel of Jesus Christ and who Joseph Smith truly was. The witness came so powerfully, it was as if I was physically lifted off my knees and taken to a higher place. This experience has become my concrete foundation to my testimony and for my love for Heavenly Father.

            My third and most recent experience came as I sought for healing to a broken heart. One night when I didn’t have the strength to bow down before my Heavenly Father, I muttered through sobs the words to I Need Thee Every Hour, and it was through this and the past 2 shared experiences and many other experiences of other natures that have shaped me and given strength to my testimony and helped me recognize my daily need for my Heavenly Father and the healing power, in all its forms, of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. The Atonement has healed my physical being, given me a testimony and healed my heart. I love my Heavenly and His Son Jesus Christ. I testify of them in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

'This I believe" by Ashley Eggers

For Such a Time as This

Certain life events are remembered as turning points.  The 1984 Summer Olympic Games in L.A. was for me a defining moment.  That summer my young self relinquished forever the goal of becoming an astronaut.  Instead, I was going to be Mary Lou Retton.   I would fly—over and around uneven bars and across the floor in a sequence of handsprings.  For the next year, I clipped her photos from Dad’s Sports Illustrated, saved every box of Wheaties with her picture on the front, and vaulted off the couch, confidently finishing with my arms in the air.  I wore out the beloved VHS ‘16 Days of Glory’, the Bud Greenspan documentary on the 1984 Olympic Games.  My mother gave in to gymnastic lessons, and I experienced for the first time the thrill of flying on a trampoline—exactly like Mary Lou almost.  I could leap, land on any angle, and soar back to my feet.  Gravity and I played together.  

I was eager to show this new talent to my mother back at home.  With her full attention (and very little forethought on my part), I leapt into the air, landed with a practiced grace on my back side…and did not bounce back up from the living room floor.  Stunned and sore, my mind tried to make sense of what had happened.  The trampoline had given me a taste of flight, but the floor replaced every trace of it with a cold, hard reality.  I was never going to be Mary Lou. 

There Are Laws and a Plan

The floor is hard.  Perhaps we don’t always expect it.  But whether we remember them or not, we can’t bend laws of physics.  Without nylon mesh and coiled springs, the carpeted floor can never behave like a trampoline.   It seems obvious—now.  Hind site is 20/20. 

Beyond the lesson in physics learned that day and in multiple occasions since, I believe in other laws.  I know there is a God, who created our world, and that we are his children.  I know He has a plan for his children that allows them to progress, learn, grow, and ultimately become like him—a Father who himself said that his work is to bring about the eternal life of his children (Moses 1:39).   There is absolute truth.  And our decisions matter. 

There Are Inherent Risks to Mortality and We Don’t Know Everything

Gravity (appreciated or not), life’s challenges, self-agency, and personal imperfections in our mortal state are reality, and as such we are subject to fall.  Even with our best intentions in our worthwhile, righteous endeavors, we have no guarantee of a smooth sailing.  And the scriptures guarantee to us we won’t.  The apostle Peter, with his characteristic zeal, musters up the faith to climb over the side of the boat and walk across the water to the Savior—and begins to sink.  Abinadi bears his powerful, final testimony to King Noah’s court prior to his execution, with no apparent evidence that his sacrifice has or will have any effect.   The modern-day prophet Joseph Smith, despite obedience to the Lord and full commitment to the work, was betrayed and falsely accused.  He finds himself in the Liberty jail where his words disclose heartbreaking loneliness and onset of despair, “O God, where art thou?  And where is the pavilion that covereth thy hiding place?” (D&C121:1)  With incomplete understanding, these men acted to the best of their knowledge.  And, at least by initial estimation if focusing on that frame in the lives’ sequences, appeared to fail.

We Are Here to Act

Such experiences are a vital part of why we are here in mortality, and key to the overarching plan our Heavenly Father created for our progression.  We are set in the present—which is all we can see with our physical eyes.  The past begins to dim from memory, and the future is unseen and uncertain.  It is the perfect atmosphere that allows learning by experience, and ultimately facilitates our growth. 

Because of the gospel, we have a clear but still incomplete picture.  We ‘see through a glass darkly’ (1 Cor. 13:12), looking forward to the day when ‘all mysterious shall be bright at last’ (Be Still My Soul). 

But for now, we are equipped with imperfect knowledge and limited understanding, and yet with the requirement to act—even when we know our lack of knowledge may result in errors.  For me, a desire to do what’s right coupled with no guarantee of outcomes can be intimidating.   Experiences have taught me that I am subject to fall—hard.  And like the sudden, unrelenting floor, these experiences aren’t anticipated.  

Despite a working [incomplete] knowledge of things hoped for, there are things I really do know.  I know God exists and is our Heavenly Father, who loves his children and hears their prayers.  I have a testimony of the Savior, and the Plan of Salvation.  These simple truths and others awe me with their significance, and give me the faith to act on gospel principles.   And this in turn brings me joy and helps me come to know the Savior.  And the more I know Him, the more I want to be like Him.

And He invites us to do so.  Its remarkable how many of His words throughout the scriptures are invitations: come follow me, come and see, come unto me, come ye that are heavy laden and I will give you rest.  He invites us to follow Him, learn from His example, and become like Him that we might feel the joy He feels. 

Can I Trust Him?

Exercising faith on my mission was easy:  I had a letter from a prophet that told me I was called of God.  I was entitled to His help.  With this knowledge came a boldness that previously hadn’t existed, because I knew that by obeying the Spirit, divine help was mine, and whatever the outcome was, it was OK. 

The Lord undoubtedly loves and generously helps his missionaries.  But what about a college student?   A resident physician?  Will He help those who’ve taken the initiative themselves in education, relationships, or career decisions?  That power that so long has blessed me—will it still lead me on? 

I’ve always been impressed by the brother of Jared.  When confronted with a challenge (crossing in the ocean in barges with no outside light), he comes up with a solution (rocks that will glow).  He approaches the Lord in faith that if He touches the stones, they will light.  As I face my own challenges, I create my own solutions, and then approach the Lord—hoping that He will touch my plans and they will illuminate.  Sometimes they do.  When they don’t, there’s a moment of uncertainty (occassionally some panic), as I search for that faith that if my plan fails, He will somehow provide another solution.   And during those moments, it’s the memory of times when the stones lighted that carries me through.

             

Success Through ‘Failure’

But there is still always that moment after taking action when the outcome is entirely uncertain, or even appears to be heading in an unfavorable direction. I still occasionally find myself asking, ‘Can I really trust Him in this thing, right now?’ When our plans—which we thought were given a divine ‘go-ahead’—don’t pan out?  When our goals—righteous goals we’ve looked forward to—don’t happen and we are left to contemplate a different life than what we wanted (ie, a family of eight sparkling children; a career as an artist; and achieving perfection as a homemaker.  At least my brownies are almost there.)?  When what we are prompted by the Lord in our mind and heart to do goes against our personality or nature?  When we start to walk on the water, feel ourselves sink, and don’t see Him immediately?  With full realization of our inadequacies, can we still muster the faith to endure and hopefully succeed?

During a challenging ‘learning experience’, a verse of scripture given less attention before, caught me off guard.  Words by the Savior: “Be ye therefore perfect”.  Perhaps it was the timing, but my heart sank and my eyes filled with tears as I thought, “But I’m not.  And so far from it!”

To me at the time, a ‘lack of perfection’ was failure. Thankfully, the Lord is not as harsh.  What He wants is progression.  He doesn’t expect from us that we make no mistakes, become such valuable points in our education.   But as His name ‘I Am’ is in the present tense, He asks that our progress be ongoing and active:

“For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been since the fall of Adam, and will be forever and ever unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father.” (Mosiah 3:19)

He wants us to become.

Making progress then is success.  We can trust that if we are honestly doing what’s best and seeking for direction (from Him that ‘upbraideth not’), the immediate outcome is not evidence of our success or failure.   As such, we can trust that apparently failed outcome will become successes in a subsequent chapter. 

What I Know

I know, as did Mordecai who counseled Esther, that our potential and purpose is signicant, regardless of how it appears…if we choose faith: “For if thou holdest thy peace at this time, then shall enlargement and deliverance arise; and who knoweth whether thou art come to the kingdom for such a time as this?” (Esther 4:14).

I know that fear (especially fear of failure) is not what he intends for us: “God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind” (1 Tim 1:7).

I know that what we see as imperfection is not a sentence but an invitation: “If men come unto me, I will show unto them their weakness.  I give unto men weaknesses that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for it they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.” (Ether 12:27).

I know and am forever grateful that because of the Atonement:

·         We can ‘fail’ without being failures

·         Our education is paid for

·         He can ultimately change our hearts and enable us to be who we were meant to be, and who we want to be

·         And that by his grace that we are saved after all we can do (2 Nephi 25:23).

I know in Whom I can trust, and in Whom I’ve trusted—in whose name I add my testimony, even Jesus Christ, amen.  

Stretch Forth Your Hand, by Cherie Jones

In the Book of Mormon we can read the story of a prophet known as "the brother of Jared." He and his people were commanded by the Lord to build barges so that they could travel across the ocean to a promised land. After building the barges, the people still had two obstacles that were preventing them from making their journey ~ the barges were watertight, and thus they had no air or light inside of them.

The brother of Jared went to the Lord in prayer and was given a solution to the first problem. But to obtain light for the barges, the Lord asked the brother of Jared, "what will ye that I should do that ye may have light?" The brother of Jared had to take some time to ponder and search within himself to discover what he had to offer to the Lord. He contemplated the power of the Lord and how he needed to draw on that power in a specific way to obtain light and overcome this challenge. He carved out several smooth stones, took them to the Lord in prayer and asked the Lord to touch the stones so that they would shine in the darkness.

All of us have been promised the blessings of heaven. We are on a journey to return to our Father in Heaven, but we also have two obstacles that stand in our way ~ physical death and spiritual death.  The solution to the first was given to us freely by means of the resurrection. But to overcome spiritual death the Lord asks of us, "what will ye that I should do that ye may have light?" It requires us, like the brother of Jared, to ponder and search within ourselves to discover what we have to offer to the Lord. It requires us to contemplate the power of the Lord and how we need to draw on that power in specific ways to obtain His light and overcome challenges.  It requires us to kneel before the Lord with our own personal pile of rocks ~ those areas of our lives and portions of our character that need His touch and will never shine without it no matter how hard we try. In those moments when we've done all we can do, when our best is overwhelming inadequate, the Lord can and will stretch forth His hand to us, strengthen us, lift us up and give us light.

"...behold, the Lord stretched forth his hand and touched the stones one by one with his finger...And thus the Lord caused stones to shine in darkness..." Ether 3:6 & 6:3

I wrote a song several years ago, attempting to capture the prayer of all who feel the overwhelming inadequacy of weakness and long for the strengthening touch of the Lord, and I'd like to share that song with you.

"And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them." Ether 12:27

You'll notice one of my weaknesses when you listen to the song. The range of the song is really too wide for me to sing well. At some point in the future I may get one of my musical friends to make a better recording, but this will have to do for now.

Stretch Forth Your Hand

(Click here to listen to the audio file)

By Cherie Andrea Jones

Oh, how I've tried to do all that you ask.
Still I fall short and despair I'm not fit for this task.
Overwhelmed, down on my knees.
I cannot do this alone.
Lord come to me.

Doubt weighs me down and I struggle to hope.
Teach me to trust in your love, be still and let go.
All I have, I give to thee
But I feel its not enough.
Lord hear my plea.

Stretch forth your hand to touch my weakness.
Stretch forth your hand to give me strength.
Stretch forth your hand, dispel the darkness from my soul.
Through my faith, bestow your grace.
Make me whole.

Time takes its toll, but I'm learning to wait.
For promised land found beyond this challenge I face.
In your plan, teach me my part.
Give me pow'r to overcome.
Lord, calm my heart.

Stretch forth your hand to touch my weakness.
Stretch forth your hand to give me strength.
Stretch forth your hand, remove the darkness from my eyes.
Help me see, what I can be.
Hear my cries.

Take my hand.
Lift me up to thee.
Draw me into your arms.
Fill me with peace.

Stretch forth your hand to touch my weakness.
Stretch forth your hand to give me strength
Stretch forth your hand, show me your vision for my life.
Make me pure, help me endure.
Be my light.

How'd I Get Here? A Convert's Testimony

May 11, 2013

Holly Vance

My Testimony

I’ve been thinking a lot about my testimony and the state of my heart since this class started, even though I haven’t been able to get to every class, and I realized that while my heart is not as open as it should be or even as open as I’d like it to be, it is improving slowly but steadily. 

It’s hard to say how and in what ways my testimony has grown, so I will provide a little background.  I spent the first 20 years of my life as a very active Catholic- I was even still active as I was taking the missionary discussions.  I went to Catholic school from preschool through eighth grade, and while at the time I begged to go to the public school, I’m grateful now for the time that I had there, as looking back I can see how it shaped me into the person I’ve become. I learned at an early age to pray and that God answered prayers, and I can’t remember ever NOT knowing that Jesus Christ died for my sins.  While Catholic and Mormon doctrines have major differences, I am grateful the basic knowledge and testimony I gained in those early years.  I have also found in looking through certain instances of my life I was definitely prepared to hear and accept the gospel.  I even believed a lot of the Mormon doctrine as a Catholic, unbeknownst to meJ  For example, I have always believed that the Godhead was three distinct beings with one purpose-there was just no way in my mind that They could be 3 persons in 1.  I remember as a preschooler asking my teacher how God could be in the form of a dove on Christ’s shoulder and at the same time speaking from the sky and saying “This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased.”  I especially hated being told “that’s something you can ask God when you die.”  How grateful I am to know that I can pray about such things and receive a testimony when I ask and study for it.

So how did I end up here? I am pretty sure I ask that weekly, if not daily.  I’m still not quite sure how I ended up converting.  I was content to go to Church one hour a week on Sunday mornings-and that was just because I just sang every week so it was easy to stay active.  If I didn’t lead the music I’m pretty sure I just would not have gone.  And singing helped me to meet my best friend, as we were in choir at school together.  All the sudden I had Mormon friends, so when my other friends were out drinking I was out “Mormon dancing.”  It worked out well for all of usJ  One of those “Mormon” friends ended up going to school at Southern Virginia University, and I went to visit her.  We ended up at a Stake Conference where they were challenged to find someone to take the discussions- that’s my cue.  I thought it was just one meeting with missionaries.  When Heidi came home she got me to come over and meet with them.  At the end they asked when I could meet them again for the next discussion, and my response was a confused “next one? How many are there?”  I met with them for all 6 discussions, and even though I knew it was true and felt like I’d heard everything before, I wasn’t ready to commit.  I’m pretty sure they only continued meeting with me because Heidi’s dad was the Stake President and we were meeting with him at his houseJ 

But long story short 6 months after I started this I realized I had to make a decision as to whether or not it was truly necessary to be baptized.  I had had a bad day at Church in Sunday school, and I went home resolved to find out what the Lord would have me do.  However, I really didn’t have any experience praying and asking for answers, and I was feeling like a brat at the time, so I informed the Lord (don’t ever do this people) that if His Church was true and He wanted me to be baptized into it, I needed a sign.  In fact, while we are at it, I haven’t seen a deer in weeks (I grew up in Montana and my apartment was on the edge of a wooded area).  So let’s make that sign a deer- Just show me a deer.  So…..2 seconds later a deer walked up to me, and had I not been so shocked I could have touched it.  Not only did it walk up to me, it stopped and stared until I broke eye contact.  If that doesn’t show you that the Lord has a sense of humor I don’t know what will.  3 weeks later I found myself getting dunked.  It was a terrible three weeks as we won’t even go into how my family took the news and still takes the news, but finally I was baptized and a member of the Church. 

I wish I could say that I learned from that experience that I need to have a more open heart to what the Lord has for me but let’s just say I’m a slow learner.

Something I did learn from that experience is that the Lord knows each of us.  He knows our fears and frustrations and deepest desires and He is willing to bless us if we will just reach out to him.  It’s been ten and a half years since I was baptized.  In that time there have been many ups and downs, more ups than downs as I look back, but I can see how the Lord has shaped and molded me into the person I am.  I’m still not sure how I ended up in Seattle, but I am sure that the Lord has a plan for us.  I have learned how to better pray for answers so that I don’t need to ask for a sign, but I don’t always listen to or even hear those answers.  I am however a stronger and hopefully better person for having the Gospel of Jesus Christ and His Atonement in my life.  This life is hard but it’s awesome.

 I sometimes hate being single, but looking back at past relationships I realized that had those worked out I would not be where I am today and I wouldn’t have had some of the amazing experiences I have had.  I don’t always like or agree with the Lord’s plan for me, but in hindsight I can always see how His plan is better and I try to keep that in mind.  I sometimes seriously can’t stand being single.  I am the last single one left of my group of close friends from high school and I’m going home this summer for the final 2 weddings.  I get tired of hearing “Aren’t you lonely?  Aren’t you old for your Church to not be married? “  I want to yell out at them “No, I love being single.  It’s the best experience ever.  HELLO!  Would YOU choose to be single?”  Seriously.  But when that happens I remember that in all the blessings and answered prayers I’ve received over the last ten and a half years, I have always felt that things will work out the way they are supposed to, and eventually I WILL get married…hopefully in this life thoughJ  I’m not a super patient person. Also, I occasionally get jealous when I see my friends happily married and having their fourth and fifth kids.  It’s cool.  No, it doesn’t bother me at all that my younger sister has been happily married for 3 years and has a beautiful fat red head little boy that I love with all my heart.  Truly it doesn’t…I can totally give him back at the end of the day when he’s cranky and tired of meJ It also doesn’t bother me to hear my dad continually say “I’m going to die before you get married and give me any more grandbabies.”  HA!  I do this to spite you dad.  No problem.  As you can see, this stuff totally doesn’t bother me at allJ 

On the other hand, in all of this time that I’ve spent single, I’ve learned that the Lord has a very strong love for me.  I know that He knows me personally and has blessed me with other experiences that in all honesty have made me grateful that I’m single.  I’ve been to Germany and Austria, 2 of my favorite places on earth.  I’ve been to Hawaii and Cancun and Washington DC and Boston.  I’ve seen Wicked 3 times and Les Miserables 3 times.  I’ve been to Disneyland twice.  I’ve had time to become a better friend, daughter, sister and aunt.  I’ve become a good nurse, and even have been able to get my wound care certification- a dream since the middle of nursing school.  When my family has gotten sick and needed me I’ve been able to be there, and when my friends are getting married or planning a parent’s or loved one’s funerals I’ve been able to be there.  And best of all I’ve finally found the time to become a temple worker.  If I was married I’m not sure how much or if any of that I could have done, so yes I can be grateful for being single.  I love the temple.   I love the time I’ve had to reflect on things and grow spiritually.  I love that I’ve been able to do genealogical work and do temple work for my family- the ones who are hundreds of years old that no one thought to forbid me to doJ  I can see the ways that my being a member of this Church has helped my family-even though they would not see it or ever admit it.  I am a stronger better person because of it and I can’t say that enough. 

I KNOW that Jesus Christ lives, and that He died for our sins so that we could live with Him in glory forever.  I have known that my entire life.  I KNOW that He has a plan for us, and if we will trust Him things will turn out better than we can ever even hope or imagine.  I know that He hears our prayers and pleadings and thanksgivings and stands to bless us at every opportunity.  I know that through His Atonement and our repentance we can become better people and help to build up His Kingdom on the earth-whether we are married or single, divorced or widowed.  We are all God’s children.  Temples dot the earth so that we can go there frequently to do work for the dead that will bless us and our families for generations.  Christ stands at the head of this Church and Thomas S. Monson is our living prophet today.  Listening to his council and that of all the leaders of the Church will help us to grow closer to the Lord.  The Book of Mormon is another testament of Jesus Christ and studying it closely will fortify us and make us stronger.  Mosiah said to “Believe in God; believe that he is, and that he created all things, both in heaven and in earth; believe that he has all wisdom, and all power, both in heaven and in earth; believe that man doth not comprehend all the things which the Lord can comprehend.  And again, believe that ye must repent of your sins and forsake them, and humble yourselves before God; and ask in sincerity of heart that he would forgive you; and now, if you believe all these things see that ye do them.” (Mosiah 4:9-10)  I know that we can’t comprehend all that He has in store for us.  But I also know that we “can do all things through Christ which strengthens us” (Philippians 4:13) if we “trust in the Lord with all [our] heart[s], and lean not unto [our] own understanding….In all [our] ways acknowledg[ing] him …he shall direct [our] paths” (Proverbs 3:5-6).  In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Final Class, Spring 2013 "May God Grant Unto You...Repentance and Exquisite Joy"

This was written for the final class of our Mid-Singles Seminar, May 8, 2013

By Holly C Metcalf

 “May God Grant Unto You…Repentance [and exquisite Joy]” Alma 34:17, Alma 36:21

It is a difficult thing to do—to give you my thoughts and testimony on the Atonement:

·         because the Atonement is very personal and in order to explain it--really, and deeply-- would take too much time and be too intimate.

·         because the Atonement is so precious to me I would wish for the tongue of angels to speak it! Yet, I know my powers to express testimony about it are limited—whose are not.  Words tend to fail. 

·         Because I know I have more to learn, more to feel, and whatever I say now exposes where I am in terms of my worship and love and recognition of my need for a Savior.  I hope someday to look back and see how much my testimony and powers of appreciation have grown!

So, I mention just 7 things relating to the topic of the Atonement of Jesus Christ and my thoughts and feelings and testimony about the Infinite Atonement and Life and You.

#1 GOD LOVES YOU:  I’ve said it before, and I say it again.  I even feel I have a special urging to say it to you.  If I could I would take you each by the hand, look you in the eyes, and say with the surety I feel that our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ loves YOU!  Our Heavenly Father knows and loves YOU!  You are a child of God, He knows your strengths and weaknesses and he still loves you and will always love you.  His arms are open, he beckons you. He will run to you to help and comfort when you invite Him, when you come to Him.  God loves you.  Believe it!  It is true! This is a message for you.

So if you are looking for true love and an embrace that transcends time, Jesus Christ is waiting.  He is the representation and the vehicle of the Father’s Love for you personally.  God is Good.  He loved you first before you ever could do anything right or wrong.  He loves you still—when you are awesome and approaching perfection and when you do not choose Him or when you turn away from His path. He loves you when you doubt, when you are disillusioned, when you are so tired you want to give up, or so lonely you ache.  He wants you to be happy, awesome, and whole! He wants to bless you beyond your dreams.  His arms are open to you.

Scripture: John 3: 16 ¶For ^aGod so ^bloved the ^cworld, that he ^dgave his ^eonlybegotten ^fSon, that whosoever ^gbelieveth in him should not perish, but have ^heverlasting ⁱlife.

 17 For God ^asent not his Son into the world to ^bcondemn the world; but that the world through him might be ^csaved.

Therefore, what?  The Love of God for us is the driving force, the founding and operating principle of the precious Atonement of Jesus Christ. 

Sometimes I wonder what went on in the pre-mortal world—how was it that you and I agreed to let the Holy One, the Sinless One, suffer and die for us?  All of us who are so eager to be independent, to not cause others to suffer for us—what was it like when we said not only “OKAY” to the plan, but we rejoiced that this precious Son of God would be the sacrificial Lamb --  for us.

Did we think then that we would coast through life without doing too much harm to Him, to others, and to ourselves? That we wouldn’t need Him as much as others would?  Surely NO! 

I believe we all must have soberly and honestly known that the dangers were great and we would be PREY! We must have known and agreed that for periods of time we would ignore Him and His teachings, give up on His love, misunderstand His commands and His mercy, and foolishly and pridefully think we knew better than God.

Through the fog of the veil of mortality,  can we recall that we were utterly certain that the Lord’s Love and the Lord’s Plan and the Lord’s Sacrifice would be enacted, fulfilled, finished for our sakes! That it was a surety that He would do His part! That justice would be satisfied and mercy extended to us all.

Certainty He would do his part, yes!  But no certainty for us doing ours—no guarantees—that was Satan’s plan as I recall. 

So now what? What can we do, fallen as we are, farther from God than we wish we were?

#2 Repentance:    And so we hear the words of Amulek again:

“Therefore, may God grant unto you, my brethren [and sisters] that you may begin to exercise your faith unto Repentance!”

Amulek asks that God will continue to GIVE US THE STRENGTH and opportunity to exercise our faith to repent.  This is the Gospel of Repentance!  It is part of the Good News. 

Repentance is a gift God grants unto us.  It is the job of mortals, it is our path to exquisite happiness! Repentance is the key to humility and unmeasured blessings.  Repentance is the key to improvement and transformation and harmony. The Savior in essence says:  “O [Repent] that ye may be even forgiven now by me”  hymn 185

#3  Prayer:  Amulek also asks us to cry unto God for mercy, for he is mighty to save. (34:17-27) He asks us to let our hearts be full, drawn out in prayer unto him continually for our welfare and for the welfare of each other!  Cry unto the Lord in every place, in every need, at all times of day and night, on our knees, on our bikes and feet, in our hearts and minds, in our cars and closets. Cry unto the Lord. Draw near unto Him.

In essence Jesus says: “Be obedient I implore, prayerful, watchful evermore! In the solemn faith of prayer, cast upon me all thy care.” Hymn 185

#4  Grace and Power:  Like Nephi, we beg that our souls may no longer droop in sin! (2 Nephi 4). Like Nephi, we can plead that our hearts will rejoice and have no more place for the enemy of our souls.  Like Nephi, we can cry unto the Lord and praise him forever, the Rock of our Salvation.

 We petition the Lord for Grace and Power, like Nephi, that we will be delivered out of the hands of our spiritual enemies and ask for His Grace to bless us to shake at the appearance of any sin in our own hearts.  Like Nephi, we ask with every yearning in our souls, to have  broken hearts and contrite Spirits, and to be encircled in a robe of righteousness. 

It is through such pleading that the enabling power of the Atonement rests upon us, helping us to fight our battles and face our foes—even our inner demons, to heal our wounds and broken hearts, to strengthen our spines and our spirits, to renew our hope and our determination, to lift us up as with eagles wings and to help us to lift others up!  We are in this together and we are not alone!

#5  OUR GRATITUDE:

On your behalf, as voice for the blessings we have received in this time together, I declare that we do know that Christ has come among the children of men, and has taken upon him the transgressions of his people, and that he has atoned for the sins of the world. (Alma 34:8) 

We marvel at this—the Son of God came down among us to suffer, bleed, and die. He came to be like man almost, to descend below all things, to have His bowels filled with mercy and compassion for our sake—for all of us, every one.

We declare that we know the atonement was necessary-- From the beginning it was part of the great plan of the Eternal God so see to it that mankind might not perish—for all of us would perish without an infinite atonement.   All are fallen and all are lost, and all must perish except there were this great and last atonement, an infinite and eternal sacrifice. It could not have been a sacrifice of man for who among us could sacrifice our own blood and thus atone for the sins of another?  Nothing short of an infinite atonement performed by the Son of God could bring salvation (34:9-14).

We testify as if with one voice, how grateful we are for the Atonement of Jesus Christ.  He is our Redeemer, our Savior, our Hope, the Light the Life and the Truth, the Way, the Son of God, the One who Loves perfectly, purely, steadily, endlessly, our gracious and merciful God!  And though our words of gratitude may not be eloquent or magnificent enough, our feelings of love for our Savior have grown over the last several weeks, and we look forward one day to bend our knees and bow our heads in His presence, with tears washing His feet.  For HE has loved MUCH!

#6 A HEART LIKE HIS:  In closing, keep thinking about developing a heart like His. Pray with all the energy of heart to be filled with the love He has.  Our hearts need to be more open to our Holy Father and our dear Savior.  Our hearts need to be more open to one another, forgiving, loving, looking for the good. Seeing with visionary eyes and loving hearts.

#7 AT-ONE-MENT:  Keep thinking about At-one-ment, for after we understand Repentance and practice it daily, there is more for us. 

All that the Father has for His children is extended to us through His Son.  Jesus says to us “If men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness, I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.” (Ether 12:27)

This process—of seeing our weaknesses, turning to God for strength,  will fulfill the plea  Moroni in the last chapter of the Book of Mormon,  “Yea, come unto Christ, and be perfected in him, and deny yourselves of all ungodliness…and love God with all your heart might mind and strength.  Then is his grace sufficient for you, that by His grace ye may be perfect in Christ.”  Seek also for the many, the myriad, spiritual gifts that will can be granted to us one by one, little by little.  Those gifts can strengthen and lift us and help us to strengthen and lift others.  That is At-one-ment and it comes by the grace of God. (Moroni 10:32)

Like the prodigal son we once were lost but now are found, were dead but now we live. For the mercy of the Son satisfies the demands of justice, and the grace of the Son enables us—through repentance and faith on his name-- to be encircled in the arms of safety. (34:16)

To us today, as Amulek of old said, “therefore, may God grant unto you my brethren that ye may begin to exercise your faith unto repentance…to call upon his holy name that he would have mercy on you.

This was Amulek’s prayer and the prayer of all the holy prophets in every dispensation, and to be bold, it is my prayer for each of us as well.

"Dear God, I would like to communicate with you"

Michael Vermillion's Stake Conference Talk
Sunday May 5th 2013

About three months ago I started praying. I had been inactive for about 17
years and had had little to no contact with the church during that time. I began
to pray with the feeling that I didn't know weather God existed or not. But I felt
that it was important that on the chance that he does exist, I didn't way to go
through life having not spoken to Him. I began these prayers for the first few
weeks with the opening, "Dear God, I don't know if you exist or not, but given
the possibility that you do exist I would like to communicate with you, because
it would seem a shame if I went through my entire life without speaking to you if
in fact you do exist." And then I would go on to say the rest of my prayers.

After a few weeks of praying this way I realized that perhaps I shouldn't open
my prayers that way anymore, that perhaps it was offensive to God. I was
beginning to feel that God was in fact listening to my prayers. So I shed the
opening line and just prayed.

I started attending sacrament meetings soon thereafter and could feel a
spirit of reverence, kindness and love in the Elliott Bay Ward. I enjoyed the
feeling of community and also enjoyed singing the songs of worship again that I
had missed hearing and singing from my youth.
 David Brooke's writes in his book "The Social Animal", "The benefit of
meeting as a group even once a month produces the same happiness gain as
doubling your income." I had also heard a statistic elsewhere that said that
singing together promotes communal bonding, provides comfort and motivates
and empowers. I wanted these blessings in my life and I was finding them at
church.

 It was over the holiday season when I had visited my family in Spokane
where I had also experienced a sense of great Joy in being close to my family
and my extended family. There was such a feeling of peace and serenity that
was shared during that time together that I felt the love of family so strongly.

My father always said, "The one true path to happiness is through
serving others." Church gives me an opportunity to serve others, to be a
comfort, to lighten the way for others around me. I've been thinking a lot about
happiness and what it takes to become truly happy. I know that service is the
key. I want to give as well as to receive the blessings of being in this church.

Back in March, I was asked to talk in sacrament meeting about my
experiences that lead me back to church. I was nervous about giving a talk,
but it turned out to be a tremendous blessing. My Testimony began to grow
from that moment. A testimony grew out of having to prepare and give that
talk. I have my Bishopric to thank for that opportunity, for it was the beginning
of a new love of Christ in my life.  I also have the spirit of the Holy
Ghost to thank for being with me as I prepared and gave that talk. My
testimony is growing. I feel the spirit strongly when I am in His service. I felt the spirit with me as I prepared this talk.

I am so grateful for my Bishop, Bishop Paul Smart. It has been my
experience that he listens to and speaks through the guidance of the Holy
Ghost. Your bishop is one of the countless blessings that come from being a
member of this church. Why pass up one of the greatest blessings of
repentance? Talk to your bishop.
 I heard a wonderful testimony last Sunday, in which someone said,
"Pray for me, that I will surrender." <pause> I pray for my fellow members of
this church that we might fully surrender to our heavenly father. In Institute
class a couple weeks ago I heard something I loved (and by the way if anyone
hasn't been to Sister Metcalf's institute class on Wednesday evenings, we
delve deep into doctrine and just being in the same room with sister Metcalf's
spirit is an experience of pure joy. It is quite astounding to see such a servant
of the Lord. She speaks with great conviction and warmth and beauty.)
Anyways, I heard someone say in her class, "Not just obey, but submit fully to
God. Obedience isn't enough. Submit who you are to God."

You all have heard the saying, "Can't you see what's right in front of
you?" I think the more important question is, don't you know that right in front of
you,  is pure joy and happiness. Right there. And all we need to do to
experience that is through service to God. How do we serve God? By serving
our fellow man.

Pure joy and happiness is out there. But we have to want to see it. We
are so often blinded by the ways of the world, we even forget that there is such
a thing as pure Joy. The other day a fellow on the bus asked another
gentleman something to the effect of, "How's everything going on down at the
bar these days?" to which the other man replied, "I took it off my agenda,
 I have other things to do." Dear brothers and sisters, if you are
consistently being distracted from the Lord's love by one or two things in your
life, I encourage you, I pray for you, that you will take them off your agenda.
And make serving the Lord, your new agenda.

In closing I will read from Alma 13 verse 13. "And now, my brethren, I
would that ye should humble yourselves before God, and bring forth fruit meet
for repentance, that ye may also enter into that rest." I bare my testimony that
this is the true Church of our Savior Jesus Christ, that we are all children of our
Heavenly Father. He loves us. I encourage everyone to pray always that the
Holy Ghost might enter your hearts and your homes. Humble yourselves so
that you may be guided by the spirit. Be a shining light unto others that you
may bring others into that rest that is the rest of being in the service of the Lord.

I say these things, in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Defining Moments

LDS Singles Testify --- Defining Moments, by Christine Kempe

I believe each one of us has moments in our lives where we have to choose with certainty which way we will go, or which way our tent faces. I call these experiences defining moments. Through these experiences I have gained valuable knowledge and felt my Heavenly Father’s love for me. My testimony is of the atonement, agency and the love of God. Faith in the gospel has never been a challenge for me, or at least, I have been blessed from a young age to know that the church is true and of the reality of Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. I have had several poignant experiences which have challenged my testimony and helped me realize what a priceless gift it is.

Yesterday I had the opportunity to do baptisms for the dead with a small group of people. At the beginning a member of the Temple presidency was explaining the process. We were to do confirmations for people baptized 2 weeks ago first, then do baptisms for different people and their confirmations would be done in about 2 weeks. My first thought was “That’s a long time to wait to be confirmed.” For some reason this resonated with me. These people who have accepted the gospel from beyond the veil are just like us, waiting upon the Lord for the promised blessings. In their case, it is the gift of the Holy Ghost. For us it may be big life events, such as finishing school, a new job, marriage, children, or waiting to be healed physically, mentally or spiritually. I know that whatever we are waiting for, will come, in the Lord’s time. In my experience the answers come as I continue to do what is right.

Agency is a topic I have thought a lot about over the past several years. It is essential to the Lord’s plan for each of us. In my opinion, it is a central principle in his plan of Salvation, beginning in the premortal life. It is amazing to me that the Lord allows us to choose, anything from the inconsequential day to day decisions, to major life decisions. I know he knows us and is aware of us. His love for us is so great that even though he can see our weaknesses, strengths and potential, he allows us to choose for ourselves. I can’t imagine the love that motivates him, for it must be great. I have found that through this process he helps us to build confidence and trust in him. Sometimes it seems that he has left us alone. I know he has not. In my life, it is often through the struggle and hard work that I continue to learn lessons about his love, myself and the gospel. This work and trust makes these experiences more meaningful to me. 

An example of this is from my junior or senior year of college. I had an experience that made me doubt my ability to receive personal revelation. At the time, it shook me. I realized I had two options. 1. I could doubt my ability to ever receive personal revelation again, or 2. I could turn to my Heavenly Father, study and try again. Obviously, I chose the second. I prayed, studied and sought a priesthood blessing. This experience provided a foundation of continued faith and trust. Now, when I have similar experiences (which continue to come), I don’t have to decide if I will move toward or away from Christ.

I have come to realize the atonement is for all and includes healing the broken, aching heart. There are some things that only the Lord can heal to make me whole. He does truly know my heart. He knows my struggles and he knows where he needs me. I know that as I continue to follow him and be obedient to the laws of the gospel, he will guide and direct me. He has given me a living prophet and apostles, who give counsel and direction. I know that as I follow them, they will lead me closer to my Heavenly Father and Savior, Jesus Christ. Although it often feels like personal direction is not coming, I know that the Lord is with me. I just have to be patient and wait for his timing. I need to trust in the peace he often tries to give me and allow his light to permeate my life.